I'm sure glad I decided to waste my time...

FLASH! Dick York's "Bewitched" Contribution Underappreciated

With so many news sources available on the internet--particularly the very, very many sites through which you can get direct Reuters or AP feeds--I tend to no longer rely on Yahoo! (my gateway of choice) to collate the top stories for me. And good thing, too--today I decided to click on their "AP Top Stories" listing and found these headlines among them:

• Aruba Police Probe Teen's Disappearance (item 5) Isn't their something about "news" that's supposed to imply "new"? This story has a "Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead" ring about it.
  
• Nancy Reagan Falls in London Hotel Room (item 6) She didn't hurt herself, and good for her, but do we really need this kind of update?
  
• Murphy the Dog Awaiting His Day in Court (item 8) I confess I didn't read this at all. Perhaps it's a moving tale of human-canine tragedy. But I doubt it.
  
• Poll: Most Say Stars Make Poor Role Models (item 11) To steal a phrase from James Taranto, what would we do without polls?
  
• 'Bewitched' Statue Goes Up in Salem (item 14) Elizabeth Montgomery was extremely hot in her day, and even long afterward, but I'm not going to visit any statue that does not commemorate the achievement of Dick York.
  
• And the item that's most likely to impact my daily life: Necktie Makers Fear Japan's New Dress Code (item 19)
  

So there we have it: just about one-third of the Associated Press's "Top Stories" are ridiculous, unnecessary, or outright puff pieces. Congratulations, AP! You've handily beaten the "hard news" ratio of network "news magazines" and morning shows, and probably beaten the evening news ratio as well...thank God for print.